Since there is a part 1, I owe you a second part. Otherwise I would have called this posting:
At the other side of the worm hole.
I think the following could be applied to life as such, but I am mainly referring to decisions on jobs and work.
I once thought that making a decision on a change worked like this:
- Define selection criteria.
- Evaluate pro’s and con’s.
- Draft a spreadsheet.
- Select the better option.
- Take the decision.
From experience, I say it rather works like that:
- Subconsciousness already takes the decision, but you do not notice yet.
- You might even fight the decision and try hard to keep yourself on (the old) track
- External event might allow you to consider a change, maybe unpleasant ones such as I lost my job in the economic crisis. There was no such event for me.
- If there is no external trigger, you have to invent one. That can be harder than being pushed by inescapable destiny.
- You start drafting spreadsheets (see above) to catch up and rationalize, retro-actively.
- You start talking about the decision you are going to take. The first attempts are not rhetorically brilliant; you mainly convince yourself.
- You are in the middle of a black empty space, a worm hole, a black hole. The only way out is through (stolen from Alanis Morissette).
- You reach the other side of the worm hole. and only then you know that have taken your decision.
This works better, if you have a chance to gradually develop a decision rather than being forced to switch gears at once (Such as: Search for a new job, quit your old job, take two weeks of vacation, start the new job). As a self-employed consultant I had the option of smooth evolution. I think I had actually started to work self-employed in field 1 in order to be able to transition to field 2 in the way described above.
I had made my decisions the quick spreadsheet way before, but I missed fundamental changes that the lack of development time did not allow me to ponder on. So, I believe in spite of all the hyperactivity in our high-speed world there are processes that need time and that cannot be accelerated.
I ended up with reasonable decisions and a track record, but I was caught in the same type of traps again and again. The feeling of being caught in a trap is a very personal and subjective thing. What is a trap and a dread for me, is business as usual or even fun for somebody else. Something that has once been fun can turn into a trap, and you may need some time to realize that.